by indigosparke

Infinity flowing
My mind
Me off balance

The frustration I feel is paralysing
The anger rises
In words and screams
That reverberate around this city

A roar
A raw and simple begging
For truth and kindness please

Please let there be ease

Not another one tainted
Stuck in a false sticky web of dark and deceit
No colour shows there
Its cold and its bare

These dualities and walking contradictions confuse me and muddle my mind and today…

Im not calm
Im not sweet
Im desperate

Desperately pleading
For a world ruled by love
Of true compassion
And strength

The war in my head makes me grow so small and combust

Today I don’t know how to be in this world
All reasoning gone
Today I want to load my gun and fire it at the big guys
Today I want to drink and drug myself into not feeling
Today I want a stranger to fuck me so I can feel worthless and like it doesn’t matter that this world is so goddamn raped of gold

But it does matter

And Mother Earth matters
And Humanity matters
And I matter

But as much as my mind tells me that

Today I feel lost and I don’t know what to do